Wow, this has turned out to be a really interesting thread :) Well I welcome anyone who wants a chat, and I've met up with a couple just for a ride out, and it's purely been as friends. And plan to see them again :) Since becoming single in 2013, and having spent many years locked up, I'm making some great friends on here, no matter their sense of humour, or not......lol
The best way to meet peeps, be it 'friends' or 'possible partners' , is to attend events or meets. Then you can actually see if you want to continue the friendship/relationship.
Exactly xk, which is why i was extending the hand of friendship by inviting people to meets.
However i will take onboard Dustin's comments n refrain from PMing those newbies, or otherwise, who say they are interested in meeting friends in future. I will no doubt bump into those who attend a meet/rideout/rally/event at some point. Seems such a shame when you know that there are peeps reasonably close who are missing out on a rideout or meet because they dont know about it.
Anyhoo, i thank all those fab folk i have PM'd in the past 18 months or so, who responded and then went on to be my mates. You guys saw me through some pretty horrible months during that time, on more than one occasion for several reasons and YOU ALL ROCK!
I think it's very interesting - the whole 'looking for' status - I bet more men state that they are looking for a female (or male for all I know..) when they are looking for a 'relationship' than women who will state looking for a male, and I think that's because women tend to be a bit more wary - it's a natural bias between the genders as women biologically will always invest more in a sexual relationship (in terms of reproduction) than men -this is a broad generalisation, of course there are exceptions!
This is probably just one of the reasons behind the differences - There's probably lots of different intentions/hopes between individuals who choose to register here, a host of different life experiences etc.
I reckon a lot of ladies register here as looking for friends as they maybe feel it gives them a bit of a safety buffer, and they can use it as a tool to put of unwanted suitors by just pointing to the 'friends' status?
aye, I do agree with that, but I don't think it explains the status thing... I'd love to have access to the database to come up with some stats - like what % of males and females who's relationship status marks them as 'available' are seeking friends or otherwise... could be interesting
I think that ladies generally being more wary fits in with the idea that women look for relationships, while men are less wary because they're 'only' looking for a girlfriend
Your right there bob.mac the site did start as a dating site but has developed into more of a social site with big meets camps and the like. There is still a lot of dating going on in the background so you could say its both.
Speaking as an old fekr . The thought of starting again , in a relationship, fills me with horror.
I'm not saying a relationship is not a wonderful thing .
I am saying that getting from a first date up to the point of being part of a relationship is pure torture. Perhaps it's just me . But I really don't think so .
Everyone puts their best self forward at the beginning. It takes an investment in time to discover the real person .
Dating wot dating? Never ever dated any one from this site (walks away whistling!)
Dont worry Tab theres plenty frogs out there. And tbh the best way to meet people is at the ride outs, partys and bashies. Personaly i try to stay single but it never works.
I always thought this site was a bikers networking/dating site. Which it is very handy to be homnest. If your after meeting friends say so and if your looking for a man or woman say so. If you dont tell the truth you will never get what you want!
Those that say there after friends but are simply after bunk up always get outed in the end and wind up loosing the trust of the comunity.
I like that the site caters well for both dating and the social side
Both aspects have worked well - I met my girlfriend through this site, and I've enjoyed making friends and going out on runs (kind of glad I couldn't go on the ill fated Borders/Kamikaze raid run!)
Tab, it takes time, and you just need to be patient
Thank god for BM - I can't imagine any other place where I could find a lady who was into bikes and understood how central biking is to my life!
Ive spoken via PM to people on here who have carried on a conversation for days and then suddenly one day they just stopped messaging ...it doesn't bother me I just figure they have lost interest so I move on, I ain't chasin' some random stranger I happened to talk briefly with over tinterweb
Nods on here I don't see the point of...on the road yes.
I too have tried talking to some women on the threads or via PM, mostly I get no response... but that's life...some peeps will speak others won't. I don't take it personally.
Oh and not ALL women are lookin for a relationship on here, some of us actually enjoy being single
All very interesting reading, good to read different points of view regards the site especially as I have been on here so long, not very long after it started.
I have never found it an issue with what people put on there status regards what they want.
I have always thought of this site as a friendship site not as a dating site but it is nice to read stories of people that have met on here and made a new life together.
What I do find slightly irritating is when people aren't truthful about their status or put tell you later, when I read that I think, Ok what they got to hide.
Everyone that joins the site is an individual and has their own reasons for joining if its to find a soul mate then that's ok and if there just looking for friends then again that's good as it proves the site is doing what its intended for, meeting the needs of like minded people allowing them to share a passion with fellow bikers.
Maybe I have taken this post of track but blame it on my age and dementia I knew what I was on about when I started the post lol
I had one member have a go at me as to why i was on this site apparently we all should be single. When I said been on here a long time and staff for most of it she had a right proper go at me
I think my profile says it all and I used to take BM pillions on runs but that led to a lot of comments/disrespect so sadly i don't now. People have their own agendas and I take what i read on here or what they say with a pinch of salt... DILLIGAM
I tend to look at Pm's as if they don't answer it's their loss not mine.
It’s worked at least once for me with one BM lady, who has been absolutely open and honest with her profile. She has a “fella” (her word for him) and makes this quite clear, but enjoys pillion riding, whereas he has no interest in two-wheeled travel.
She’s in the same line of work as I am and, like me, lives in the North-West of England (though not in the same conurbation), so we had some common ground. Realising that she would more than likely fall asleep on the back of my ER-5, I offered her instead an insight into my favourite motorcycling activity - rallying. As it happened, there was a rally on the horizon - or, to be more accurate, in West Yorkshire - which featured a pub to which Josephine Public had access, so I put forward the idea that she should meet me there on the Saturday of the event.
She was kind enough to accept, and I must admit I had a whale of a time. I like to think she enjoyed herself, too. Once she’d accurately assessed me as a “friendly drunk” we got on pretty well. It was a good job I was there, though; every time I went out for a fag or stepped up to the bar, I returned to find her being chatted up. This was understandable - she’s an attractive lady - but I don’t think her fella would have approved.
She left late in the afternoon. I had thoroughly enjoyed her company, and we still sporadically pm each other. (She appears to like my posts on the Forums. In a minority of one, most might say.) If she wants to do it again, I’ll willingly accommodate her, even though it will mean braving another plethora of “Where’ve you been hiding her?”-type questions again after she leaves.
By carefully reading her profile and acting accordingly, I ended up experiencing what from my point of view was a totally positive meeting-up with another BM member.
^^Being the prat that I am, I didn’t point out a salient factor in the above post; that the lady concerned’s fella knows exactly what she’s doing and who she is with, so their relationship is quite safe.
With my pedantic attention to detail, I should have alluded to this, but I’m somewhat distracted this weekend. I learnt at the “Pi**ed as a Parrot” Rally that Davy Glover of the Cloggers MCC had pegged out and been cremated a matter of days earlier. It was totally unexpected - so much so that the club had purchased his ticket in advance.
The P.a.a.P attracts rallyists of an advanced age, so one should get used to such news. But as Alan Hansen said in relation to the Hillsborough disaster: “I went to about 12 funerals. I’m not the best at these sort of things because I don’t think I’m very strong, emotionally, and they were getting worse and worse for me. You start off thinking, 'By the time you get to five or six [funerals], you’ll get used to it,’ but they were getting worse at the end for me.”*
Can any fellow veteran rallyists who are considering snuffing it please change their minds? Just to indulge me. I’d be most grateful.
*"Three Sides Of The Mersey", Rogan Taylor and Andrew Ward, Robson Books (London), ISBN 086051 871 X
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