One fine day in the middle of the night
Two dead men got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other
Drew their swords and shot each other...
Jack and Jill went up the hill
to fetch a pale of water
Jill came down with half a crown
She didnt go for water....
there was a young priest from belgrade,who found a dead pro in a cave,he said "it's disgusting,but she only needs dusting,and think of the money i'll save !!"......................(roar of applause)
There was a girl from the Azores Whose crotch was covered in sores All the dogs in the street used to eat the green meat That hung in festoons from her draws.
Mary had a little skirt with splits right up the sides and everywhere that Mary went the boys could see her thighs.
Mary had another skirt 'twas split right up the front ...But she didn't wear that one often.
Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair. Said Simple Simon to the pie man 'What have u got there?'
Said the pie man unto Simon "Pies you dickhead".
Jack and Jill Went up the hill And planned to do some kissing. Jack made a pass and grabbed her ass Now two of his teeth are missing. Mary had a little lamb Its fleece was white and wispy. Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease And now it's black and crispy.
There once was a man from Madrass Whose bollocks were made out of brass When he'd bang 'em together They'd play "Stormy Weather" And lightning would shoot up his ass
There's a woman on-line now called Penny Whose internet lovers are quite many Her web-sites the best Cos she shows off her chest But none of the fans will get any
There was a young man with a shiner Who met a loose woman from China She said there's a cure for that Stick it under my twt And he ended up with his nose in her vagina.
I put this in 'Poetry' a while ago but..........................
There was a young lady from ClaphamWho had too many kids and would slap ‘em, Till the council said, “Cease!”Now she calls the policeAnd they come round with tazers and zap ‘em.
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