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Jokes, Games & Silly Things

Long and rude (ish) but funny

Long and rude (ish) but funny - Forums [Biker Match] Long and rude (ish) but funny - Forums [Biker Match]
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Long and rude (ish) but funny

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This got the whole of Sydney laughing. Read it and you'll see why! Justimagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney.The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game iscalled "Mate Match". The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestantanswers"yes",he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personalquestions.The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with (phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same =three questions correctly, they both win the prize.One particular game, however, several months ago made the Harbour Citydrop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the fu**iest thing you've heard yet.Anyway, here's how it all went down:DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?"Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have." DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast ifyou win.What is your name? First only please."Contestant: "Brian."DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?" Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please."Brian: "Sara."DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?" Brian: "She is gonna kill me."DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"Brian: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work."DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?" Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?" Brian: "About 10 minutes."DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have saidthat if a trip wasn't at stake."Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice." DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this =morning?Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?" Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with usfor couple of weeks..."DJ: "Uh huh..."Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time." DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."Brian: "On the kitchen table."DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundredtimes I've done it.Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up.You listen to this."[ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ]DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?" (Touchtones.....ringing....)Clerk: "Kinkos." DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"Clerk: "This is she."DJ: "Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now andI've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now" Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not togive any\answers away or you'll lose.Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?" Sarah: "No."DJ: "Good!"Brian: (laughing)Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"Brian: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest."DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. Ifyour answers match Brian's answers, then the both of youwill be off tothe Gold Coast for 5 days on us. Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work."DJ: "What time?" Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect is manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question awayfrom a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?"Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."DJ: "Where did you have it?" Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?"Brian: "Just tell him, honey."DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sarah?"Sarah: "Well..." DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?Sarah: "Up the ................."They had to call an ambulance for the DJ he thought he was going to havea heart attack , he could not stop laughing. Apperently there was an unusually high call out of the Sydney Policejust after this conversation , for minor traffic collisions.

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Brummie Jackie @ 15/07/2009 14:10  

Ok I really must stop reading the funnies when I am supposed to be working .. or speaking to a customer !!!

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Deleted User @ 15/07/2009 14:28  

excellent jaks.....

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chunkichick @ 15/07/2009 15:30  

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