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Jokes, Games & Silly Things

about women over 40

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about women over 40

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By 60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting. Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her. Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of him self with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?', here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

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sweetheart @ 18/10/2009 21:12  

I always value a woman's' opinion. Thanks for this sweetheart.

Yes, I recognise my sad self...

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limeninja9 @ 18/10/2009 21:34  

well what can you say? nice one......

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anneka56 @ 18/10/2009 23:57  

This elderly lady went to the doctor for a checkup. Everything checked out fine. The old lady pulled the doctor to the side and said, "Doctor, I haven't had sex for years now, and I was wondering how I can increase my husband's sex drive." The doctor smiled and said, "Have you tried to give him Viagra?" The lady frowned. "Doctor, I can't even get him to take aspirin when he has a headache," she claimed. "Well," the doctor continued, "let me suggest something. Crush the Viagra into a powder. When you are giving him coffee, stir it into the coffee and serve it. He won't notice a thing." The old lady was delighted. She left the doctor's office quickly. Weeks later the old lady returned. She was frowning and the doctor asked her what was wrong. She shook her head. "How did it go?" the doctor asked. "Terribly, doctor, terribly." "Did it not work?" "Yes," the old lady said, "It worked. I did as you said and he got up and ripped his clothes off right then and there and we made mad love on the table. It was the best sex that I'd had in 25 years." "Then what is the problem, ma'am?" "Well," she said. "I can't ever show my face in McDonald's again."

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WheelyNealy @ 19/10/2009 00:01  

What a fantastic post SH, and as a woman who won't see 40 again I have to totally agree :-)

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Deleted User @ 19/10/2009 05:19  

Andy Rooney should be castrated,his revelations are too close to the bone..lol

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excalibur @ 19/10/2009 08:27  

Im over 40,!!!! and so I really loved ur post,SH. U made me & Speaking on behalf of all women over 40....(im sure) THANKYOU! This is 4 u....& those cute yellow pants....

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Roaring Ruby @ 19/10/2009 09:31  

Such a good post SH .Soooooooooooooo funny, sausages... pig etc. I actually laughed out loud

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 10:00  

Personally I think women over 40 rock!....Deffo better at a lot of things :P

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ghosthunter @ 19/10/2009 11:31  

i could not agree more, i have found happiness with LC who is a couple of years older than me .....

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 12:14  

How kind you are young sir xxxx flutter You are more than generous with " a couple of years older" lol

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 12:30  

i know the right things to say babes......xxx fancy a indian tonight ???

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 12:33  

I'm 42 next year, and all I can say is I've never felt sexier and more at peace with myself than I do now

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Nutkin68 @ 19/10/2009 12:38  

"never felt sexier"....you wern't bad before! pmsl

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ghosthunter @ 19/10/2009 13:43  

I'm cookin tonite, you gotta start eatin yer greens man!!! xx

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 13:46  

I'm cookin tonite, you gotta start eatin yer greens man!!! xx

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 13:46  

oooo that's two lots of greens!!!! he he

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Deleted Member @ 19/10/2009 13:52  

Age is but a number

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Brummie Jackie @ 19/10/2009 15:12  

Quite right BJ

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Nutkin68 @ 19/10/2009 16:33  

yep........even over 50..........its not the age that matters, its the person..............condition, attitude, trustworthiness and mileage on the clock..............just like a bike.................age is of very little importance in the great plan of things

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babyharley @ 19/10/2009 17:41  

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